I hate offending people. I really don't like making someone angry or sad, it is never my intention. So I'm very sorry that my casual use of the phrase "single parenting" to describe my situation made someone feel any negativity.
I also hate assumptions. I don't like being admonished by someone who doesn't know all the details of my life. I don't think anyone who knows me and who has watched me live the last two years of my life would say that I am anything but an adult. Nor would anyone who knows my life argue that my perspective on what is or isn't difficult about parenting or adulthood is anything but pretty fucking accurate. I've handled what life has brought me with some pretty serious grace under pressure, and I have never felt the need to throw my hardships in anyone else's face to make them feel badly when they let off steam about the tough stuff in their life.
I intended to entitle this post "Open Mouth, Insert Foot" but decided against it because I don't think I have anything to apologize for. I'm just sad that I unintentionally made someone angry.
From here on out, I'm sure I won't find myself using the title of "single parent." Lesson learned. However I probably also won't find myself advising any other parents about what does or doesn't make them an adult, and nor will I ever say that I don't feel sympathy for their situation just because I believe mine to be more difficult.
4 comments:
I think some people take offense because they are having a hard time and need to take it out on somebody. I never thought for a second you were belittling single parents. In fact, I am positive I've used the "single-parenting it" before. So, no worries :)
I'm pretty positive I've used the term "single-parenting" as well. I totally understand where it came from and I know you would never mean to offend anyone :-)
thank you ladies. :)
I think you were correct in calling yourself a "single parent". Being a single parent myself, I understand that there are many types of single parents. Many are women and men who are married but the spouse is not available a lot of the time. In my book that means you are a single parent because you are the only one there to discipline and love and feed them day to day. And please do not misunderstand me, I am not ragging on the spouses I understand the need to work, since I work myself. I don’t think you were trying to belittle single parents because right now you happen to be one of them and you should be supported and not attacked.
Sorry for the rant but that really bothered me and being a single parent I thought I should step up and say something.
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