watching my sweet lil elliot navigate his way through the Toddler Gym today brought me to tears several times... and my raging pregnancy hormones were only partially responsible. ;) whenever he is in a group of kids i am reminded constantly of what a sweet, gentle little guy we have on our hands. today kids bigger AND smaller than he is were pushing him out of the way to cut and go down the slide, or climbing in from the other side of a car he was trying to get into and forcing him out. and elliot just steps back and lets these things happen. and watches the older/stronger/more agressive toddler walk away with the toy he was trying to play with. other toddlers just don't understand that they need to wait their turn. and/or their parents aren't nearby TEACHING them to wait their turn.
he is socially a happy, outgoing little dude. always quick with a smile and to say hello. but when it comes to physical activity and confrontations he always backs down immediately. the mama lion in me wants to run over and say "HEY! my son got that toy first!" but i know that i have to let him learn to take care of himself in these situations. so i stand back and watch, and only allow myself to interviene if it looks like someone is about to get hurt.
my lil guy just likes to take his time. he climbs up to the top of the slide cautiously, and then takes his time sitting down and getting his feet pointed the right direction. and i'm glad for the caution, probably because i'm the same way. but when compared to other toddlers who throw themselves headfirst off a couch or are fearless at gymnastics class when climbing or running on the beam, i worry that i should be teaching elliot to be more physically confident. then again, i know that if elliot WERE climbing and jumping off chairs or leaping off the couch i would be a ball of nerves. 
and i don't want elliot to be the bully. i don't want him to be the one to force the gentler kids out of the way to snatch up the toy he wants. until he is old enough to understand better about sharing and taking turns i would rather he be the one who watches, seemingly unfazed, while things are snatched away from him.
as we wait for Little Brother to make his appearance (any day now, Lil Guy!) i'm torn between SO much excitement over meeting our new family member, and regretting that i have to give elliot ANY less attention than he currently gets from me. i know that the lessons learned by having and being a sibling are invaluable, and one of those lessons IS about waiting patiently, and being more independent. and we are so excited about seeing elliot and his little brother learn and grow together. but man, i'm hoping that (like the Grinch on Christmas day) my heart will grow 3 sizes when Little Brother appears to accomodate more love for them both, because i don't want to give a drop less to elliot to make room for anyone.
he's my special little guy. and he's maybe a little too nice right now (like mama can be) and doesn't stand up for himself all the time (just like mama is still learning to do) BUT, we hear enough "MINE!"'s to know that he's capable of doing so. and i'm sure that staking claims on toys will be yet another thing he learns to do when he is suddenly forced to share with Little Brother... so that will be progress, for better or for worse.
2 comments:
I love this post. :) And Elliot is SO so adorable!
Isabella is the same way. She's all about the "mine" and "gimme" at home but once she's in a social setting she's so docile. There have been times I wanted to encourage her to stand up for herself or to smack some motherbitch upside the head for letting her kids run free, but I bit my tongue because I'm almost proud of the fact that Isabella is so easy going around other kids. I figure I better enjoy just in case she flips the script and turns into some playground hoodlum.
I am loving how adorable Elliot is. Angie herself would be jealous of those lips.
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